Relevance Archive - Page 15 of 20 - The Art of Communicating

You can’t delegate focus

This aspect is important. And that one, too. Also, don’t forget that other aspect. Oh, did I mention that this one over here is really important. You absolutely need to understand this.

And so, the website has given me about a dozen messages. All of which are important. Like really important.

But, really? Are they? Can they be? All of them?

Because let’s face it: I’m not going to take away a dozen messages. There’s just no way. I’m going to focus on the things that catch my attention and spark my interest the most (if the site’s lucky) or just leave if I can’t find any.

If you are unwilling to decide what’s most important, you’re essentially delegating that decision to your audience. It’s incredibly unlikely that they will agree with you that all of your messages are important. Like really important.

Our audience will focus. And we might not be too happy with their choice.

Focus is one of the tasks that we absolutely can’t delegate to our audience. Not if we care for our message. Not if it matters that they walk away with the right message. Rather than any message.

We just can’t risk that they take away the wrong things. And thus, we can’t delegate the decision to focus.

tb;dr

No! Most likely the reason why you didn’t bother to read the piece was not that it was too long but that it was too boring.

People have no issue with longform if they give a damn. People binge watch 5 episodes of Game of Thrones in a row and read books until late in the night. While skipping tweets and TikTok reels.

If someone has an issue sticking with a piece of communication, length is most likely not the issue.

It’s much more likely that either this piece is just not for you or that the creator of that piece didn’t care enough about who gives a damn and why.

So, for you: Who? And why?

And when it’s me, then draw me in. Step by step – at each step giving me a reason to care for this step.

Alex, the brilliant time waster

Alex is brilliant. Her words are often full of wisdom. In fact, I only know a handful of people who know as much about their field as she does.

Alex is also a huge time waster. Because her wisdom is usually the team’s to discover. Her thinking is dense. Her slides are packed with stuff that’s totally clear to her but not to her team. Her language is quite special with words that have a specific meaning to her but not to the team.

The sad part of the story is that this happens not only with brilliant minds like that of Alex but it is often the default even for people who are far less brilliant.

In fact, often we find ourselves to be ok with communication that lacks clarity. Somehow, it seems acceptable to have the team figure out what it all means. Rather than have one person invest the time to figure out how to speak with clarity, we have all the others invest the time to figure it out.

Great teams get stuff done more quickly because they have figured out how to speak with clarity (among other things, of course).

PS: Of course, Alex is not her real name.

The easiest way of getting to a “yes”

It’s a simple truth: The easiest way to get a decision maker to approve a decision is to offer something that they actually want. Of course, the obvious question is: What do you do when you need their approval for something that they don’t want?

Try empathy!

Why are they right to not want it? What do they want instead? How does what you want align to what they want? How could you modify the idea you want them to approve so that it also gets them what they want? How does your idea contribute to them getting what they really want?

It’s even better to ask these questions before you actually build your project, your product, your proposal. When you do, all you need to do with your pitch is to tell a true story about the thing you’ve built.

What are presentations for?

You’ve got 30 minutes of exclusive access to an audience. You’re standing in front of a room or zoom full of people who granted you access to their time. What do you do?

Too often, things go wrong in one of two directions.

One, people consider this occasion to be an obligation. It’s part of their job and so they have to somehow get through. But it’s not an obligation. It’s a privilege. It’s the chance to make an impact. To inspire them. To open their eyes. Or make them curious.

It’s a chance to change people’s minds.

Two, people consider this occasion to be an opportunity to take. They put the spotlight on themselves. Tell us how great this is and how awesome that. They want to take our applause, our money, or our approval. But it’t not an opportunity to take. It’s much rather an opportunity to give. To give us insights or advice, a new perspective on a profound issue we’re struggling with. Or something to aspire to. Maybe just a next step that we had somehow overlooked but is so obvious now that we see it.

It’s a chance to build trust.

Clearly, you’re brilliant

Clearly, you’re brilliant. You’re doing work that matters. You‘re making things better for your clients, not in a small but in a big way. You see things that others don’t. You make things happen that others can’t. Your results are proof for it.

Why then are you not dominating your niche?

It’s easy to find excuses for this. Others have a bigger budget. You don’t have time to do more marketing. You’re happy with the way things are. You dislike sneaky marketing techniques which your competition is using to trick a customer into a deal. You need more time … and many more …

But it’s a lot more useful to ask one simple question: Why are your customers right in choosing your competition over you?

So, why?

Not that important

“I don’t have time for doing a workout today.”

You probably don’t.

Or do you but you’ve got more important things to do? Or maybe you’re just happy you’ve found an excuse. Or not.

Replacing “I don’t have time for X” with “X is not that important” is a great tool to get your priorities straight and focus on what’s important rather than urgent. What is the right thing to do in the long run rather than what feels good in the moment?

“Doing a workout today is not that important.”

“Spending a few hours with my kids this evening is not that important.”

“Refining the pitch deck is not that important.”

And we can even reverse it:

“Watching three episodes of this TV show is rather important.”

“Jumping on Instagram right now is rather important.”

How do you feel about your decision now?

(Actually, I think it’s even better to remove “that” and “rather” so that the decision becomes “X is not important” or “X is important”.)

Choice blindness or “Why did you choose that thing”?

Shoppers in a supermarket were asked to participate in a market research study. Two flavours of jam were presented to them and they had to decide which one tasted better. After they tasted their favourite flavour for a second time they were asked why they liked it better. The catch: In the meantime, the two flavours had been exchanged so that they, in fact, tasted the less favoured a second time. The surprising outcome was that more than half of the participants didn’t even notice the trick yet still found reasons why the flavour that they tasted for the second time tasted, well, better.

Don’t believe me? Watch this short documentary about this psychological phenomenon called decision blindness:

This experiment was repeated over and over again in different contexts. Men were asked to choose among two images of women and then had to reason why they liked this one better. Shoppers had to reason why they preferred this laptop configuration over another, and so on and so forth.

It turns out that, as humans, we’re pretty great at finding reasons for the things we do.

Rather than doing the things that we find good reasons for.

That’s what decision blindness is about. It’s the phenomenon that once we have decided upon something, we tend to look for (and find) good reasons for why this was a good decision – no matter how we came to that decision.

J.P. Morgan, the founder of the bank that carries his name, called it the two reasons:

A man always has two reasons for doing anything: a good reason and the real reason.

Now, it turns out that the good reasons are never a problem in communication. Because if we start from work that matters … if we’ve sweated the details, then we’ll always have enough good reasons to win any rational argument.

Only that it’s not about the rational arguments to start with. Because if they don’t align with the real reason of our audience, decision blindness kicks in and they will just happily take our arguments and make them fit their decision.

This is one of the reasons why we dig deep to understand the real reasons of our audience in the “Leaders Light the Path” masterclass.

A respectful approach to marketing

Most marketing is geared towards changing what people do. Essentially, it’s about making them buy something they wouldn’t have bought without our marketing.

I feel like a better approach is for marketing to be geared towards changing what people see. This kind of marketing, which I call “lighting the path”, is about making people see something (in a way) that they wouldn’t have seen otherwise.

And then, it trusts them with the decision to buy it (or vote for it or apply the advice). Its goal is not to persuade but to resonate.

It might lead to the same result. People might buy from us. And so, it might look like a little difference. But, it’s actually a profound one. A more truthful and respectful marketing approach.

It works only when we care deeply for our audience because only then will we be able to make products and craft messages that are so relevant that they resonate.

But when they do, and when our product actually delivers on what we promise, we’ve built trust. As a result of respect for our audience. And that leads to loyalty.

Have you seen that hilarious ad?

“Have you seen that hilarious ad?”
“Yeah, so great. Which brand was it for again?”
“Uhm … well … no idea.”

I’m sure you know that ad. Or a similar one.

You may also know that elaborate talk in which the speaker so eloquently used all sorts of linguistic devices. Or that presentation with the beautiful slides. That website with the clever animation.

The audience cheered. But they never bought.

Because they didn’t get the point. And thus, didn’t buy. Or worse, they bought but now they are disappointed because they expected something different.

A lot of effort goes into optimising the looks of a piece or the feel of a talk to build something that’s super beautiful, hilarious, eloquent, and clever.

Something that hits right into the bull’s eye.

Only that it’s been the wrong target. Not the one that was intended.

That’s because a lot of communicators start with refinements before they get the big picture right. They start with the details before the focus is properly set.

It’s much more effective to get the target right first. What is that piece for? Who is it for? What needs to change for them? What do they need to make the leap from there to here?

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