Status Archive - This Moment Counts

Why did that meeting really explode?

“I don’t think you realize the chaos this is creating!” Her voice was clearly sharper than she wanted.

The COO snapped backed: “And I don’t think you’re grasping how slow we’ve become. We are drowning in inconsistency.”

An hour into the meeting, the discussion had very much escalated. What had happened?

Well, the exec team was debating whether to centralize key decisions or grant teams more autonomy. Kind of classic clash territory. And this meeting was no different, a constant back and forth.

The CEO kept coming back to coherence. Fewer exceptions. Less duplication. One company, one way of doing things.
The COO kept coming back to ownership. Fast reactions close to customers. Managers who can act without waiting for permission.

At some point, the language turned into labels: Chaos! Bureaucracy!

And then, the COO closed their notebook. “We are miles apart on this. If we centralize like this, we will kill initiative.”

The CEO later told me she felt like they blocked necessary progress.

We looked at the situation again, trying to understand what each side actually wanted.

The CEO wanted faster decisions and less duplication.
The COO? Faster decisions and less duplication.
Both wanted clear standards for teams.

So why did it turn into a battlefield?

Because at some point, both of them stopped getting it right. And wanted to be right. It’s a frequent pattern I see in my coaching.

Once the goal is to be right, every counterargument feels like a personal threat. A concession feels like a loss of status.

But once you see this, how can you go back to getting it right?

Stop defending your story and shift to something like this:
“What would have to be true for their concern to be valid?”
“What are they protecting that I might be underestimating?”

Now the objective is not to validate your take. You try to understand the constraints well enough to design a better way forward.

In messy executive reality, a path is often available long before everyone agrees on why. In fact, everyone can have different explanations for why it’s the right choice. And it still works for everyone.

The best part is this: once you’re moving, yesterday’s opponent can become tomorrow’s loudest advocate.

Keep lighting the path,
Michael

It’s less about the raw number

There’s this superhero kind of person who never seems to make a mistake.

You point out a number that’s clearly wrong.
They come up with some nebulous broader picture.

You investigate into that picture.
And suddenly they pull out an obscure stat from a famous university.

They seem to be in full control.
On top of things.
Clearly knowledgable and well informed.

It’s almost impressive.
Until you realize that’s it’s all just their magic fog.

There’s really no point in arguing with them.
The clearer you get, the more fog they’ll produce.

Instead, focus on the room.

On the people quietly wondering if they are the only ones confused.

State what is clear.
Say it simply.
Help them see through the fog.

Because the Obfuscator’s fog only works when everyone lets it.

You could be the one who doesn’t.

Keep lighting the path!

The room is bright, but the path is dark

Sometimes I wonder why so many meetings feel like a talent show.

Everyone’s waiting for their turn to impress.
With every update trying to sound important.
And every opinion hoping to win the room.

But of course …

The more people try to stand out,
the less the team stands together.

I don’t think this is vanity.
It’s often uncertainty.

There’s no clarity on direction.
→ Where are we headed?
→ Why are we headed there?
→ Why is this journey ours to take?

And if no one knows what really matters,
they fall back on showing that THEY matter.

That’s why the best leaders light the path.
They turn the spotlight outward.
Forward.

So there’s a sense of purpose and belonging.
We’re in this together.
For something that matters.

When everyone is trying to shine in their own light,
you get bright spots everywhere.
But none of them point forward.

That’s where progress lies.

Keep lighting the path!

Status Update Day

It’s Monday. Status update day in many teams.
But listen closely …

you’ll hear a lot of words that sound like progress but without any actual progress.

Because somewhere along the way, “status update” stopped meaning “how far we’ve come”.

And started meaning “how good we sound”.

It’s about protecting (if not pushing) personal status, rather than monitoring project status.

No wonder real problems stay hidden.

What does “status update” mean in your team?

Keep lighting the path!

The moment is yours

I’ve always envied quick-witted people.
Here’s why today, I embrace the choice to not be one of them.

We’ve all been there.

Someone throws out a perfect comeback: sharp, effortless, and timed just right.

The room laughs.
The moment is theirs.

And you think: Why can’t I do that?

Well, you can.
There’s actually a pretty simple way: practice.

Quick-witted people aren’t born that way. They’re quick because they go for it.

A lot.
Without overthinking it.

They throw out lines all the time. The thing that’s easily overlooked is that most of their lines aren’t particularly great. Some of them are actually kind of lame (especially their first ever).

But they don’t care.
They simply go for it again.
And again.
And again.

And when a line does hit the mark, we remember the brilliance of that line and forget the many misses.

In other words, if you want to be more quick-witted, you can start today. There’s no secret sauce.

Let go of perfection, respond faster, see what happens, repeat.

But before you go all-in, ask yourself this:
Why do you want to be quicker?

Because when the laughs fade, what’s left?

Sure, the sharpest remark won the moment.
But the most thoughtful remark changed the conversation.

It comes with less glamour, but with a lot more impact.

So, maybe quick isn’t what you actually need. Maybe what you’re looking for is confidence. The ability to speak up without second-guessing. To express yourself without fear.

That doesn’t come from being faster. It comes from knowing that when you do speak, what you say will matter.

So instead of chasing speed, try this:
Listen better. Think deeper. And say the thing that moves the conversation forward.

I prefer to take my time.
How about you?

Keep lighting the path!

Doomed to fail

Many great ideas have died as a result of status fights. In the meeting room it became more important whose idea it was rather than whose idea was best.

And so, the best idea died.

Of course, the world couldn’t care less about your status struggles. If you show up with an inferior idea and others show up with their best idea, who’s gonna make it?

For that reason, Rick Rubin, the famous producer, tries to remove names from ideas as much as possible: “I always ask for any information shared with me to not be labeled and not explained at all.” This allows him to judge an idea based on its merits rather than based on whose idea it was.

And quite likely that explains part of why he has managed to produce winning records for over four decades and become one of the most influential producers of the world.

Have you taken any deliberate steps to leave status out of the decision making process?

“Can all of you see my brilliance?”

Status updates are supposed to quickly inform everyone about the status of a project.

Too often, though, these updates are much rather about the status of the people in the project and carry double meanings along the lines of “I’m not to blame for the delay.”, “This is my kingdom. Don’t you dare to invade it.”, “I’m smarter than her.” etc.

In many cases, this happens when the team can’t see how the project is about something bigger than themselves. And so, they lack a sense of belonging to a team that achieves more than anyone could achieve on their own.

Which means that, effectively, everyone’s on their own team.

Which is why they need to protect their status.

Great project leaders create that sense of belonging. They light the path by communicating with irresistible clarity where we’re going as a team, why we’re going there and why everyone belongs.

The right idea in the wrong meeting room

Some pitch situations quickly turn into a status game.

The pitching party feels high status because they feel like they’ve really nailed it and have an extraordinarily brilliant product. It’s going to change the world (which might be true).

The decision maker feels high status because they get to decide about the proposal and they want you to know that they have the final say. They are extraordinarily brilliant in identifying trends (which might be true).

Inevitably, both desires for higher status clash when one of the parties makes a claim that the other just must dispute – because, well, they know it better (which might be true).

The world, however, couldn’t care less about who’s right and who’s not. Or about who’s in charge and who’s not. They care about which ideas see the light of day. And so, the right idea in the wrong meeting room likely isn’t worth much when the parties have status as their top priority.

Change happens easier if we ban status from the meeting room.

If the other party doesn’t see it that way, you might be better off looking for a different partner.

The brilliance of salespeople

“Look, you’re not so brilliant. But don’t worry because I am.”

That’s, in essence, the approach of a certain breed of salespeople: To play the high status game. There’s a matching breed of customers who that works for. They are ok with someone else taking the lead.

The opposite approach is the low status game which is all about doing whatever the customer wishes for regardless of how useful that is. There’s a matching breed of customers who love that kind of relationship.

For the rest of the customers, a third approach might work a little better: “You’re brilliant in what you do. We’re brilliant in what we do. Let’s so something brilliant together.” It’s a balanced relationship in which everyone gets to shine in their respective field.

When a story spreads

Your story spreads when your audience is able and eager to tell your story.

So.

Are they able to tell it? Do they get it? Is it crystal clear? Can they repeat it? In their language?

But also: Are they eager? Why would they want to tell it? Does it boost their status?

You need both. Easy doesn’t help if there’s no reason for your audience to tell your story. On the other hand, a strong reason to spread your story won’t help if it’s hidden underneath a layer of confusion.

The easier it is for your audience to tell your story and the more the telling of your story boosts their status, the more likely it is that your story actually spreads.

Posts in Tag: Status