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How I wrote my first book

When my Physics course in (the german equivalent of) high school started, my teacher made us an offer: “For every single topic that we cover over the course of the next three years, you can hand me in a text covering what we learnt in your own words. I promise that I will meticulously proofread every text and give you feedback on how well you understand the material, how well it’s argued and how well it’s written.”

Three classmates took the offer, including me. Of those three, I was the only one to do this for every single topic. When I finished school, I had basically written a textbook on school physics, mercilessly edited by my teacher.

That practice has served me well ever since. I’m thankful for this opportunity and for the generosity that my teacher has shown.

I’m also baffled at how often people will just pass on opportunities to grow.

Not so easy

Most questions that are worth investing the time to prepare a presentation for don’t have an easy yes-or-no answer.

If there would be an easy answer, we wouldn’t even bother with gathering everyone in a room. We would just send a memo to inform everyone about the answer.

One of the problems with meetings is that a lot of trivial stuff gets disproportionately overblown and floods the attention of participants. So, they tune out. And start not paying attention to presentations.

Another problem with meetings is when you pretend that there is an easy answer when in fact there isn’t. That’s a huge potential for frustration and a great way to start into fights.

Treating the team as smart takes you a long way. Some things are complex.

Smart teams don’t need complex things dumbed down. They need a way to make the complexity accessible. They need simple words to explain difficult concepts. And even then they appreciate it when we acknowledge that there’s room for different opinions on the matter.

Attention to detail

Attention to detail is not the same thing as perfectionism.
You can value the former and still beware of the latter.

Attention to detail means caring for the little things and getting them right. It’s about taking the time that’s required to make it just right, not perfectly right. When you pay attention to detail you’ll commit to shipping but refuse to rush a job.

Perfectionism means that you don’t care about time at all. You can’t because you will only ship when it’s perfect. It takes as long as it takes … which is probably forever. That’s why as a perfectionist, you can’t commit to shipping.

Ultimately, perfectionists don’t really care for the thing but for themselves. They want to spare themselves the embarrassment of shipping something that leaves space for criticism. They hate criticism.

Paying attention to detail shifts the focus away from yourself and onto the experience of your audience. Which can’t happen when you don’t ship.

The fear of practicing

Most people feel at least a little anxiety when they think about their next talk. One of the nasty tricks of that anxiety is that it likes to extend itself to the act of practicing for the real thing.

As a result, some avoid practicing for as long as possible because the thought of practicing ignites the anxiety about the actual event. Which causes them to postpone practicing. Also, there’s another email they need to reply to, anyway, it’s really urgent.

The problem, of course, is that this makes things even worse. Because as the event approaches, they’re still just as unprepared as a week ago. Which only amplifies the anxiety. This, in turn, amplifies the stress that the thought of practicing causes because you know that practicing will surface what’s not working well – and you haven’t got much time left to fix them.

And yet, that was the point of practicing: to surface what’s not working well so that you can fix them in time and show up prepared. In fact, practicing is the only reliable approach that can prepare you for the actual event. Practicing is what makes you feel less anxious when you’re in the actual situation.

Here’s the crucial shift: Practice is a safe space. It’s like taking a risk, but without the actual risk.

The overlooked part of pitch preparation

When you’re pitching an idea, the actual pitch presentation is only part of the conversation. Sometimes a small part. And yet, it often gets all of the attention in the preparation process.

It’s just as important to prepare for the Q&A part. But how do you do that, given that you don’t know what actual questions are going to be asked?

My favorite way is to play the devil’s advocate game and to do it rigorously. Choose someone on your team to challenge your idea in every possible way and have an actual conversation.

Here’s the crucial part. You have to play it seriously. It’s easy to be satisfied with the first reply that pops into your mind and just check the box. Resist that urge and play it seriously! Challenge that reply again.

And when you’re done, repeat the whole process. Again and again. Changing roles in every cycle.

You will never need most of the situations you’ve gone through in that process. But remember that in order to appear as though you didn’t have to prepare, you gotta be prepared 10x.

The proud hustler

The hustler is proud of that they made it. They worked the night through and hit the submit button one minute before the deadline. Which felt so good. The kick of adrenaline did its part in amplifying that feeling.

It also makes for some really great stories. After all, that’s the stuff that heroes’ journeys are made of: overcoming the obstacles, standing on the verge of defeat, but still making it and succeeding in the end.

All good reasons to be proud of yourself.

The alternative would be to be proud not of that you made it but of what you made. Which is hard when your focus is in hustling your way through the final night.

When you need to just hit that deadline it’s hard to focus, at the same time, on making it the best thing you can possibly make.

When have you been that hustler? What have you changed so that next time you could focus more on the outcome as opposed to just somehow making it to the finish line?

The not so obvious aspect of how you show up

Eat. Drink. Sleep. Turn off your phone.

When you’re going into a high stakes meeting or when you’re about to enter the stage to give your opening keynote, these are the things that get little attention but can make or break the whole thing.

We obsess over the content of what we’re about to say. But when we’re not awake in the moment, the delivery might ruin it. When we’re not awake in the moment, we might not get the subtle signals on the other side of the table. Or when we’re just plain hungry, we might feel a bit dizzy and not really be on the top of things.

The part of being prepared that’s easily overlooked is our well-being. Taking care that we get a good night’s sleep. That we drink enough and eat enough (and in time). That we don’t put our brains in panic modes with urgently screaming mails. And that we don’t overstress our concentration with social media craze in the minutes running up to the meeting.

Feeling well matters. Although you’re not in full control you can consciously create the conditions that make it more likely that you show up physically and mentally fit.

Being prepared for the bad days

On the great days, you could just wing it. When you’re in the flow and the words just fly by, when you’re getting energy out of the moment and people are glued to your lips, that’s when you’re on the top of things.

The bad days can be very different. The flow just won’t arrive, the words just don’t come. Worse, your words are even kind of confusing, you’re picking the wrong metaphors and the blank stares on their faces don’t really help, either. It’s all a bit uncomfortable for everyone.

That’s why we don’t show up unprepared. It’s not for the great days (although preparation can make them even greater). It’s for the bad days.

That shift is what turns you into a pro. It allows you to perform at a high level even if you don’t feel like it (and even better on the days you do).

Explorations

What would happen if you made it more fun?
Used some pink? Or instead made it a bit more subtle?

What if you told a story?
Or started your presentation with the beamer off?

What if Sarah on your team is way better at public speaking than you are? Have you considered letting her do most of the talking?

There are a million ways to tell your story. It’s rather unlikely that the one you’ve always used is the only one that resonates with your customers. It’s even possible that you haven’t found the best way, yet.

Keep exploring!

An unfair advantage

There’s this rare breed of communicators who just seem to nail it with every single word. They speak with such a level of clarity that their words feel almost irresistible.

Some call it an unfair advantage. Others call it a reality distortion field.

I don’t think it’s unfair at all. What makes it appear unfair is the fact that only a few are willing to put in the effort to truly find these words.

In my work with leaders across the globe, a few consistent patterns have emerged that the most skilled communicators have mastered more than others. Would you like to find out how well you do in each of these areas? Would you like to learn where you need to improve so you can master them, too?

Then this might be for you: I’ve assembled a deep dive self-assessment to help you understand what’s already working well in your communication and where there’s a potential for growth. That’s the actual unfair advantage: The will to keep improving.

Leaders who have already gone through this tell me that the process of reflecting on the questions alone provided them with quite some aha moments. Plus, the results and actionable tips will be presented right away, no email required.

Ready to dive in? It’s free.

PS: Here’s what others had to say about the assessment:
“The results are clear and compelling and they resonated with my self-assessment.” – Jackie Lopey
“The results are totally compelling. For me there’s clearly room for growth but also strengths to build upon.” – Ariana Friedlander
“I loved how seamlessly it worked and the valuable information and feedback it provided. The assessment was accurate in its description of how I think, communicate and what I need to change.” – Pam Benham

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Picture of Dr. Michael Gerharz

Dr. Michael Gerharz