It’s easy to measure the wrong thing.
Many measure approval:
- enthusiastic applause in a presentation,
- likes on your post,
- or words like “makes sense” in a meeting.
Even though nothing changes afterwards.
And yeah, approval feels good, but it’s deceptive and misleading. It makes you feel validated, but your message might still be stuck.
Resonance is different. It’s often not as “loud” as approval and it takes a little practice to spot. Here are some signals to watch for:
Do they lean in or pull back?
Are people eager, curious, or energized when you finish speaking, or do they immediately drift away?
Do they repeat your words?
The clearest sign of resonance: your audience uses your language, not because you ask them to, but because it feels natural to them. They use it as if they’re their words (which, in a way, they are).
Does their behavior shift?
Resonance isn’t measured by applause (though it may be a byproduct); it’s measured by action. If they genuinely change how they approach decisions, challenges, or conversations, your words have resonated deeply.
Are they asking better questions?
If your message resonates, it stirs curiosity. People seek more clarity or want to explore further, not out of confusion, but because they’re intrigued.
You know it when you see it. But it’s easy to miss if you don’t care to look for it (or are distracted by measuring the wrong thing).
Are you seeing those signs in your conversations?
Keep lighting the path!
