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There’s no aha without a huh.

You can’t lead with answers if no one’s asking the question.

That’s the mistake many communicators make.
They jump straight to the solution.
→ The vision.
→ The strategy.
→ The next step.

But no one’s leaning in.
Because no one’s wondering.

If your message doesn’t start where they are, e.g. from
→ a tension they experience,
→ a question they have,
→ a doubt they feel,
they might not be open for your answer.

It’ll sound like noise.
Even if it’s brilliant.

If there’s no “huh?”,
there can’t be an “aha!”.

Now, here’s where it gets interesting. Often these things are hidden.

It’s a tension they can’t name but is clearly there.

Or a question they don’t know they have but is obvious once you articulate it.

Perhaps it’s a doubt they don’t have words for but is clearly bugging them.

Putting that into words and leading your announcement from there is the difference between communication that makes sense and one that also feels right.

It doesn’t start where you want them to be.
It starts where they are.

Keep lighting the path!

Where do you find the right words?

You grab them right out of people’s mouths.

In the early days of my career, I would sometimes spend nights and nights thinking about the perfect words.

And when I thought I’d found them, I edited the text again.
And then once more.
And again.

Never really sure if it’s the best way of saying things.

Often, it wasn’t.

Because I was chasing my words.
Words that sounded right to me.

Today, I do it a little differently.

I’m not looking for the “perfect” words anymore.
I’m just listening for their words.

Because, it’s their words that will resonate with them.

And how do you find those?

Not by thinking harder.
By listening better.

Keep lighting the path!

Exactly what I needed to hear


Many messages fail not because they’re unclear,
but for being clear about the wrong thing.

They answer questions no one was asking.
They solve a problem people don’t think they have.
They show a path forward but not the reason to take it.

That can be incredibly frustrating (on both sides).

But you know what’s even more frustrating?

Believing it’s a clarity problem …
and then working twice as hard to clarify that thing even more.

Adding more examples.
Tightening the wording.
(Perhaps watching a couple of YouTube videos with hacks to give the message more punch.)

But whatever we do, nothing.

Here’s the part we don’t like to admit:

The problem wasn’t how we said it.
The problem was what we chose to shine a light on.

To me, that’s good news. Because it means you can stop persuading harder.

“Simply” turn the spotlight around, from why it matters to you to why it (also) matters to them.

So you can resonate stronger …

It’s a world of a difference when you don’t just say, “Here’s what I think.” but make others say, “That’s exactly what I needed to hear.”

Keep lighting the path!

Making space for people

Something that immediately caught my eye during last week’s trip to southern Sweden:

There’s space.
Not just for cars (like here in Germany).
But for people.

Sidewalks are wide enough to walk side by side and pause without blocking anyone.

Bike lanes let one person stop without slowing the rest.

To me, it felt like the cities were planned with the people in mind, as if someone had asked “What do people need here?”

(Here in Germany, the guiding thought often seems to be where’s the space for buildings and cars.)

Now, what if we applied that thinking to leadership communication?

Instead of how to make the people fit in, how can we make space for them? So they not only can, but want to do their best work.

Some thoughts on this:

Do we allow space to pause?
So often, we overload our messages with urgency and instructions. But not every word has to move people forward. Sometimes, we need to stop and pause to understand better, find the connection, or simply regain some energy.

→ In your conversations, can someone take a moment to reflect?

Do we create space for different angles?
Companies love streamlined thinking and fear losing control. (Did I ever mention that I once lost a client because they were afraid their teams would start thinking too freely?) But not everyone thinks alike. And that’s the point. When you create space for different perspectives, working styles, and priorities, you don’t lose control, you gain depth.

→ In your meetings, can people show up with their unique perspective?

Is our message designed for people, not just performance?
It’s still a common pattern: This is a professional environment, just get over it and get stuff done. But what if the most professional environment was the one where people belong fully, as a human, not just a professional?

→ In your messages, can people (including you) speak from the heart?

Curious for your thoughts …

Keep lighting the path!

Hidden Priorities

What do you do when no one says what they really want?
Everyone cringes. But no one dares to name it.

One client put it this way:
“In our case, we have so many competing interests but people won’t openly communicate what they are.”
Ouch …

When people won’t name their priorities, it’s not just hard to align … it’s almost impossible to even begin.

Often, that silence is a symptom of fear.
→ Fear of being exposed.
→ Fear of losing influence.
→ Fear of making a bad deal.

Or simply:
→ Fear of being the only one to commit.

When that’s the atmosphere, simply pushing for agreement won’t work.

Even if people nod and politely smile during the meeting, it’s unlikely they will follow through.

What you need at this stage is not their agreement but their honesty.

But how do you create a space that makes people feel safe enough to be honest?

Often, that starts with one person naming the tension and inviting a shared direction.

For example, by asking something like this:

“Can we try to name what we do agree on — even if it’s only the bigger picture? Let’s see where we’re already aligned before we get stuck in the details.”

That kind of move shifts the focus.
From trade-offs to common ground.
From defensiveness to collaboration.
From protecting interests to building trust.

It won’t resolve everything. But it opens the door.

And sometimes, that’s all it takes — a few well-chosen words that help people see the possibility of standing together, not just apart.

The goal is to figure out what it would take for the people in your org to say: “Yes, that’s what we stand for, even if we still debate the details?”

So no, you can’t control the others.
But you can make the first move.
And the right words can give others permission to follow.

Sometimes, clarity begins with making others feel seen.

Keep lighting the path!

What if they just don’t listen?

“How do you deal with people who just don’t listen, no matter what you say?” This question comes up often in sessions with clients …

I bet we’ve all been there. And it’s so frustrating.

You prepare carefully.
You explain clearly.
And still … it feels like talking into a void.

But here’s the thing:
→ Most people aren’t ignoring you to be difficult.

They might be overwhelmed.
Distracted.
Maybe protecting themselves.
Or they just don’t see what’s in it for them.

Perhaps they just got out of a tense meeting, their inbox is a mess,
and here we come with another ‘important update’…

So when someone’s not listening,
I try not to push harder.
I try to get closer.

What do they care about right now?
What are they worried about?
What language already makes sense to them?

Because let’s face it, people don’t tune out because we’re unclear.

They tune out before we’ve even earned their attention.

So, instead of repeating the message, louder and slightly tweaked, I change the starting point.

If I can say something that makes them feel seen, that lowers their guard, that makes them think, “Wait… that’s true”, I’ve got a chance.

It doesn’t work every time.
But it works far better than pushing the same message again.

In the end, it’s not about forcing them to listen.
It’s about becoming someone they want to listen to.

Keep lighting the path!

The trap of clarity

The moment you feel your message is clear… is the moment you’re most at risk.

Why?

Because your brain says: “Done. Clear enough.”
But your audience’s brain might still go “Wait, what?”

This is the trap of internal clarity.
Sometimes called “The Curse of Knowledge”.

It convinces you to stop short. To assume they’ll get it. To assume clarity in your mind equals clarity in theirs.

Just because you see it clearly doesn’t mean anyone else will.

You’re too close to it. You already know the story, the steps, the stakes.

But that doesn’t mean that they do.

Some useful questions:
→ Am I assuming they know what I know?
→ If they had to act on this right now, would they know what to do?
→ Where might they still be scratching their heads?
→ Did I just explain the facts, or did I make it clear why they should care?
→ Did I give them the full picture, or just pieces of the puzzle?

That’s the tricky thing about clarity in communication. The only thing that matters is whether it’s clear for them.

Keep lighting the path!

Invisible work

Scrum Masters get underestimated all the time.
“You just run the meetings, right?”
“You’re kind of like the project manager?”

Wrong.

You’re the one who notices the silence when someone’s holding back.
Who spots the tension that doesn’t show on Jira.
Who asks the question no one else dares to ask.

You don’t just run meetings.
You shape safety.
You unblock more than tasks, you unblock people.

Every sprint, you see the patterns:
who speaks, who hesitates, which topics get sidestepped.
And you do something about it.

You ask the questions leaders don’t always like.
You challenge teams to look beyond the sprint and think bigger.

It’s invisible work.
But it changes everything.

The next time someone asks what you do, try this:
“I don’t run the team. I help them run smarter.”
And that’s leadership right there.

Keep lighting the path!

PS: I’m giving a keynote at this year’s Scrum Day. Would love to see you there. It’s a fantastic lineup of sessions and an inspiring mix of people.

What happens when you try to win me over


If you try to win me over, you’ve already lost me.

Not because I’m stubborn.
Not because I don’t listen.
But because the moment you start to persuade,
my defenses go up.

I stop feeling heard.
And start feeling handled.

You’re not with me.
You’re working on me.

And the harder you try,
the more I drift away.

Everything changes when it stops feeling like a pitch
and starts feeling like a conversation.

When you’re not trying to move me
but trying to understand me.

That’s when I begin to care.
That’s when my defenses go down.

Don’t persuade harder. Resonate stronger.

How about you?
How do you react when you sense someone’s trying to persuade you?

Keep lighting the path!

Fine. You won the argument.

So why does it feel like you lost?

Perhaps because you have.

Sure, you made your case. You proved them wrong. There was zero room for doubt.

And in the end they gave in… “Fine. Whatever.”
But is that really winning?

I’ve been through this way too often before I noticed that even when you win the argument, you can still lose a lot.

For example …

→ Trust. They agreed, but not because they believe you. They’re done fighting.

→ Influence. They’ll think twice before engaging with you again.

→ Progress. The fight is over. But the problem is not.

And the strangest part?
The argument itself was never actually the point.
You’ve won the wrong conversation.

It turned out we forgot to ask the more important question: “Wait a second, what problem are we actually trying to solve here?”

Be honest: How often did you have an argument without really knowing the answer to that question?

So, what would actually moves things forward?

It’s not “winning” the argument.
It’s shifting the conversation entirely.
It’s clarifying the path:
→ What path are we on?
→ What are we trying to achieve (together)?
→ Where are we aligned?

Because as long as the conversation itself is unclear, proving a point means nothing (except, perhaps, for your ego).

The most important lesson here might be this:
Don’t let others drag you into an argument that misses the point (even if you know you can win that argument).

Keep lighting the path!

Spread the Word

Picture of Dr. Michael Gerharz

Dr. Michael Gerharz